I am officially 40 pounds lighter from my all time high weight, and a size smaller in clothes. Feels great. Stress isn't always a bad thing.

Someone was banging on my door at nearly 2 in the morning. Dog went beserk. Now I'm freaked out, can't sleep, scared. Heart feels like it's lodged in my throat.


"Hard times are inevitable-death, financial struggle, family problems, the loss of a job, depression-all of these tough times are just seasons. Abraham Lincoln once said, "This too shall pass," and you can apply it to both the good times and the bad. The thrill of a new relationship won't endure forever, just as the grief of losing a loved one won't either. So endure the hardships of life, knowing that time will eventually heal your wounds and you will make it through. Think about what struggles have occurred in your life and what they taught you. No matter how dim the light at the end of the tunnel seems, it is still a light. Each day is an opportunity for that light of hope to get closer and closer, until eventually the clouds above your head part and you feel the forgotten sunshine on you again. Overcoming pain makes you stronger and better equipped to handle the next valley." Spark

rules to live by?

EACH DAY . . .

1. Learn something new. Share it with someone else.
2. Do something nice for someone else.
3. Do something nice for yourself.
4. Think of at least one specific thing to be thankful for.
5. Do something to grow your business/advance your career.
6. Eat three healthy meals.
7. Do some form of exercise for at least 20 minutes.
8. Do something you enjoy.
9. Do a chore a day.
10.Make sure each of the above affirmations were met.

Personal challenge = personal triumph

Several months ago, I attempted to do this small hike to some local falls. It was very much a physical AND emotional challenge for me. I feel like I failed both. It's been at the back of my mind ever since, bothering me.

Today, the dog and I went for the same hike. The sign says it's a 15 minute trip up to the falls. We did it in 10 minutes, with only a couple of stops, to take pictures. The dog loved it. I loved it. It's gorgeous there. Nature is beautiful and calming and I've forgotten how much enjoyment I can get from being outdoors. I thought about this the other day, as I was another a different walk outside on a local trail/walk. How beautiful the light going through the trees was, the incredible colours of the river and how the water went over the rocks. Being out in nature is good.

So, I've done the hike. Another personal triumph. What's next? Bring it on!

 
 
 
  

 
 
 
  

"A true friend is the one who knows more about you than yourself and still loves you."

 
  

"Don't ever save anything for a special occasion.
Being alive is the special occasion"


"Whatever else you do or forbear,
impose upon yourself the task of happiness;
and now and then abandon yourself
to the joy of laughter.

And however much you condemn the evil in the world,
remember that the world is not all evil;
that somewhere children are at play,
as you yourself in the old days;
that women still find joy in the stalwart hearts of men;

And that men, treading with restless feet their many paths,
may yet find refuge from the storms of the world
in the cheerful house of love."
Max Ehrmann


"There is no difficulty that enough love will not conquer, no disease that enough love will not heal, no door that enough love will not bridge, no wall that enough love will not throw down, no sin that enough love will not redeem... It makes no difference how deeply seated may be the trouble, how hopeless the outlook, how muddled the tangle, how great the mistake. A sufficient realization of love will dissolve it all. If only you could love enough, you could be the happiest and most powerful being in the world…"
Emmet Fox


"The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, not to worry about the future, or not to anticipate troubles, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly"
Buddha

My mornings typically consist of me dragging myself out of bed, sitting in front of the computer with my coffee, checking my emails. I'm on several mailing groups and get inspirational emails once a day. I like to post the ones here, that speak to me. I've always been told I have a nice smile. :-)

"Have you ever contemplated how much a smile can change a person's day? Both the person who smiles and the one who sees it are positively impacted by such a small act. This seemingly tiny reflex can perk up a bad attitude, make you seem more warm and inviting, and often pass some happiness on to others. So the next time your alarm goes off for your 5 a.m. run or your dog barks in the middle of the night, smile instead of grumbling. You'd be surprised how a positive face can in turn become a positive and motivational attitude!" Spark

"A smile is a curve that can set a lot of things straight." V Borge

This came in an email today. Reminds me of a time years ago, when I realized, because of a major world event, that life is too short and you have to tell the ones you love, that you love them and want to be with them. I reached out and good things happened. I've been reminded again and am in that frame of mind once again.

"Around the corner I have a friend,
In this great city that has no end,
Yet the days go by and weeks rush on,
And before I know it, a year is gone.
And I never see my old friends face,

For life is a swift and terrible race,
He knows I like him just as well,
As in the days when I rang his bell.
And he rang mine but we were younger then,
And now we are busy, tired men.

Tired of playing a foolish game,
Tired of trying to make a name.
"Tomorrow" I say! "I will call on Jim
Just to show that I'm thinking of him"

But tomorrow comes and tomorrow goes,
And distance between us grows and grows.
Around the corner, yet miles away,
Here's a telegram sir," "Jim died today."

And that's what we get and deserve in the end.
Around the corner, a vanished friend.
Remember to always say what you mean.

If you love someone, tell them.
Don't be afraid to express yourself.
Reach out and tell someone what they mean to you.
Because when you decide that it is the right time it might
Be too late.

Seize the day. Never have regrets.
And most importantly, stay close to your friends
and family, for they have helped make you the person that
you are today."

"The need to weather hard times is constantly part of our business and personal lives. Do you ever think of these hurdles in a positive light? The next time you are faced with opposition, instead of looking at it as a source of anxiety, view it as an opportunity! Can you apply what you have learned to other areas of your life? Will this experience make you stronger and wiser next time around? Sometimes the worst and most painful experiences are the ones that help us grow the most. Having a positive attitude can deflate even the scariest situation. Overcoming adversity can help you achieve the extraordinary!" Spark

"The majority of us lead quiet, unheralded lives as we pass through this world. There will most likely be no ticker-tape parades for us, no monuments created in our honor. But that does not lessen our possible impact, for there are scores of people waiting for someone just like us to come along; people who will appreciate our compassion, our unique talents. Someone who will live a happier life merely because we took the time to share what we had to give. Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have a potential to turn a life around. It's overwhleming to consider the continuous opportunities there are to make our love felt." Leo Buscaglia

"You only have one body - respect it. You only have one mind - feed it. You only have one life - live and ENJOY it." Des'ree

  

 

This me on my 40th Birthday, with my gorgeous daughter. We had a nice quiet day; went to a major mall and did some shopping (I found black on black Croc flip flops) and then to my favorite scrapbooking store where I picked up a few goodies. We were supposed to go out for a nice meal but in the end came home and I got into my pj's, climbed into bed with a CTMH catalogue and cardmaking magazine and I'm a happy camper! I really needed a "low key" birthday, because I knew I would be "celebrating" without my husband, and that just made me so sad. I so would have loved to have him been a part of today. 

"We cannot hold a torch
to light another’s path
without brightening
our own."
Ben Sweetland

 
  

These stunning flowers were waiting for me when I got home tonight (worked part of a shift at the hospital - yes, one of my vacation shifts); from my dear dear friend "D"; for my 40th birthday. He is such a sweetheart and so good to me. He knows I adore him. 

 

Took this picture last night when I noticed how pink the sky was. Made me feel peaceful. 

"In order for people to be happy, sometimes they have to take risks. It's true these risks can put them in danger of being hurt."
Meg Cabot

 

My beautiful daughter. Growing up so fast. Three more weeks and it will be grade 11 for her. Time is going by so fast; wish I could slow it down somehow. 

 

It was my mom's 75th birthday yesterday. Happy 75th Birthday Mamma! I had a few of her friends over in the morning for a little surprise "coffee'n'cake" party and then the family went out for dinner at a local restaurant. Always make the best of those gatherings and took some family pictures. 

 

Look what I built, all by MYSELF! I can't wait to get the tv on it and get some of those Ikea baskets and put pictures up. It's really simple, but my kind of style and I think, suits the rest of the room. 

"Trying and persevering—but failing—to see your goals realized can be frustrating. Margaret Thatcher once said "You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it," and she was absolutely right. You''ve got to believe that you will succeed! Never admit defeat as long as time and effort remain. Our greatest asset is patience; our greatest weakness is throwing in the towel. Banish discouragement and feelings of impossibility by working hard, doing more, and not giving in! A diamond was only made beautiful after hundreds of years as a lump of coal." Spark

Yesterday was a great day. DD and I had a good time shopping together at Ikea... got new bedding for both of us. Switch things up a bit. Went to the baby shower; it was so nice to see our friends and their beautiful baby girls. They are really beautiful - mom was absolutely glowing.

Today has been pretty productive. Cut the back lawn and hosed down the deck. Sprayed down the furniture. Scrubbed the upstairs bathrooms. Now it's just the kitchen and the floors. It's a little warm right now so I'm saving it til this evening. Laundry is going.

Been fighting a headache for about 12 hours now; on and off. Thought it might turn into a migraine, which I used to have all the time, but very rarely over the years lately. I don't know if it's stress, heat, or something else.

Had a pedicure (total foot health care!) on Friday as well as getting my hair done. Back to more natural colour. Lots of compliments, so that always feels good.

  

Comfort Zone

"Trying new things can give you a real zest for life. Pushing beyond your comfort zone in a responsible way helps you grow confidence and creativity that you can apply to your everyday life. Do not let fear control what you do (or don't) do? While taking risks can be scary, doing nothing is a big mistake, as it produces nothing fruitful within you. There is a direct relationship between the things that we achieve and the effort we put forth to obtain them. To reach the fruit, you have to climb the tree first!" Spark

Cultivating what gives you joy

"The easiest way to identify what our heart wants is to examine the feelings that surface when we relate to that subject. Do you find solace when picking up your journal to write a daily reflection? Does time spent with your family thrill you to tears? What feelings arise when you chase down the things that make your heart flutter? True happiness comes when we routinely engage in positive activities that we love. Take a look at your life as a whole. Pursue the things that make you feel alive and fill you with joy, and healthy balance." Spark

Today's happiness:

1) visiting with dear friends and their twin baby girls
2) day spent with daughter
3) trip to Ikea

  

I've said it before, but it needs to be said again. In dark times, when you are in crisis, you truely find out who your true family and friends are. Tonight I had them with me. And it was good. I love having a house full of people, even though I don't know how to cook for that many. I love the children laughing and interacting. I love my girlfriends who have been so caring of me these past few months. "J", "A"s husband, taught me how to use my own BBQ tonight. And even though that doesn't seem like a big deal, for me, it's another one of those steps of independence.

 
 
  

Had a really fun time last night with friends. Lots of laughter. Good food and good drinks. Good times.

Over the past few days, have made a variety of 20 cards. I'm on some sort of roll. Also did a two page layout today as a gift for friends. Hope they like it. Feels good.

Flooring guys have been here for todays and are nearly done. I sure hope the problems have been fixed. I am nervous to go in there once they are done and gone. What a drag it's been, fighting with the flooring company for 1.5 years to get this fixed. Dread having to move all the furniture back again; tough job on your own. Some things aren't going back into the bedroom; a trip to Ikea is in order!

Need I say anything?

I want to be here.

Happiness

What is my happiness today?

Chicks on the deck for drinks!!!

"For most of life, nothing wonderful happens. If you don't enjoy getting up and working and finishing your work and sitting down to a meal with family or friends, then the chances are that you're not going to be very happy. If someone bases his happiness or unhappiness on major events like a great new job, huge amounts of money, a flawlessly happy marriage or a trip to Paris, that person isn't going to be happy much of the time. If, on the other hand, happiness depends on a good breakfast, flowers in the yard, a drink or a nap, then we are more likely to live with quite a bit of happiness." ~Andy Rooney

blessings

I had a fun day with my girlfriends. Laughing, cardmaking, chatting, cardmaking, laughing some more. These women are so good for me. To me. Two husbands came this evening and in less than an hour, finished off the work that probably would have taken me all night (and a lot of tears). I am so thankful for their help.

 

Kamikazi anyone? 

inspiration

"There is nothing to be gained by wishing you were someplace else or waiting for a better situation. You see where you are and you do what you can with that." -Jacob K. Javits

"You only grow by coming to the end of something and by beginning something else." -John Irving

"You can do what you have to do, and sometimes you can do it even better than you think you can." -Jimmy Carter

"It does not take much strength to do things, but it requires great strength to decide on what to do." -Elbert Hubbard

What is my happiness today?

Getting together with friends and making "fun" cards!

What did I do today?

First, slept in til nearly 11am. Amazing.

I've removed the baseboards from the dining room, which went fairly well. Am about 1/3 through the bedroom and it's much more difficult because the contractor used some sort of bonding agent. My goal is to get the boards off intact; I worry the contractor will think I've butchered the walls. It might just be easier to have him install bigger white baseboards when he comes back. Certainly not a fun job, but no one else to do it.

Did some housecleaning and that always feels good to have that done. Few loads of laundry are done as well. Baked muffins for dd and I to have for breakfast on the patio. Didn't stay out there too long as it just got too warm. I cherish any time I get to spend with her.

Spent some time reading, both book and online, as well as journaling. Things are becoming clearer for me and I am starting a plan of action.

Took the dog for his walk this evening. He sure enjoys it. I think he's used to it being me taking him out now; pretty good on the leash. Keeps looking back to make sure I'm there. He is a good loving loyal friend.

There was a young woman who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and had been given three months to live. So as she was getting her things "in order," she contacted her Pastor and had him come to her house to discuss certain aspects of her final wishes.
.
She told him which songs she wanted sung at the service, what scriptures she would like read, and what outfit she wanted to be buried in.
.
Everything was in order and the Pastor was preparing to leave when the young woman suddenly remembered something very important to her.
.
There's one more thing," she said excitedly. "What's that?" came the Pastor's reply. "This is very important," the young woman continued. "I want to be buried with a fork in my right hand."
.
The Pastor stood looking at the young woman, not knowing quite what to say. That surprises you, doesn't it?" the young woman asked. Well, to be honest, I'm puzzled by the request," said the Pastor. The young woman explained. "My grandmother once told me this story, and from that time on I have always tried to pass along its message to those I love and those who are in need of encouragement.
.
In all my years of attending socials and dinners, I always remember that when the dishes of the main course were being cleared, someone would inevitably lean over and say, 'Keep your fork. It was my favorite part because I knew that something better was coming...like velvety chocolate cake or deep-dish apple pie. Something wonderful, and with substance!
.
So, I just want people to see me there in that casket with a fork in my hand and I want them to wonder "What's with the fork?" Then I want you to tell them: "Keep your fork...the best is yet to come."
.
The Pastor's eyes welled up with tears of joy as he hugged the young woman good-bye. He knew this would be one of the last times he would see her before her death.. She had a better grasp of what heaven would be like than many people twice her age, with twice as much experience and knowledge. She KNEW that something better was coming.
.
At the funeral people were walking by the young woman's casket and they saw the cloak she was wearing and the fork placed in her right hand. Over and over, the Pastor heard the question, "What's with the fork?" And over and over he smiled.
.
During his message, the Pastor told the people of the conversation he had with the young woman shortly before she died. He also told them about the fork and about what it symbolized to her. He told the people how he could not stop thinking about the fork and told them that they probably would not be able to stop thinking about it either.
.
He was right. So the next time you reach down for your fork let it remind you, ever so gently, that the best is yet to come.

Friends are a very rare jewel, indeed. They make you smile and encourage you to succeed. They lend an ear, they share a word of praise, and they always want to open their hearts to us.
.
Show your friends how much you care. Remember to always be there for them, even when you need them more. For you never know when it may be their time to "Keep their fork."
.
Cherish the time you have and the memories you share ... being friends with someone is not an opportunity but a sweet responsibility.
.
And from me to you, keep your fork...

My boy.

 

What do you think of these sheers? I know I don't have them hanging correctly. It looked good in the catalogue. I also didn't order the correct number of panels, so waiting on the other side to arrive next week. I wanted something more sheer and light because the room is so small, but to help filter the bright afternoon sun. Some of the furniture is fading due to sun exposure. I think the dark green panel might be better on the outside with the print in the middle. 

Spent the past couple of days driving into the city for various appts. Stressful appts. Driving stresses me out too. Just not fun times.

My girlfriends and I went for a walk last night, which was good and then came back here for a long visit. My friends... they are so good. Loving pure hearts that see the best in everyone.

Next week is pretty booked. The floors are being replaced (finally, after 1.5 years of fighting). So I have to empty out all the furniture and remove the baseboards in preparation. Having friends over for "drinks on the deck", hosting a BBQ, getting my hair done, a pedicure, attending another stressful appt and then ending the week off with a day trip to the city to attend an open house for dear friends who had twin girls a month ago. Leaves me little time to feel down and sorry for myself!

Let the party begin!

I'm on vacation!